How I recreated my entire life at 55 years old and got married to a beautiful man younger than me.
I arrived in the UK in 2011 with several goals different from what I achieved today after 13 years
In those days, I arrived with my ex-partner and my 9-year-old daughter, thinking of staying in London for only one year before moving to Australia.
But all my projects changed drastically when I discovered that the father of my daughter was cheating on me when he was going back to Italy with an excuse to work. We split and carried on to live with my daughter, but after 3 years, my daughter decided to leave London and study in Italy.
In those moments, I thought I had seen the bad side of my life, but the worst had not yet arrived.
Because of my fragility and loneliness, in those days I chose again the wrong man, and straight away I gave my heart to a selfish narcissist who was more interested in taking pictures of girls 40 years younger than him instead of creating a new life with me.
I tried to work on this relationship for three long years, closing my eyes, but in the end, I had to run away from his emotional abuse.
I left London and moved to Bristol, restarting a new life in 2019
Everything seemed to be working perfectly with a new flat, a new job, and new friends. In those days, I was so concentrated on myself and my well-being that I rejected any relationships, apart from some flirts.
But in early 2020, the COVID pandemic started, and I had to spend 6 months of my life isolated in my flat, far from friends and family.
In those days, many people could have fallen into depression because of the strange and dangerous situation, but I found again the strength to create a new job and start to work for Bristol University.
In the COVID pandemic, a contract of work was surely better than working as a self-employed person. Then I joined a hiking group and enjoyed almost two years-long walks around the countryside of Somerset, Cotswold, Devon, and Wiltshire.
But the unlucky period was not finished yet
One of my best friends, part of the hiking group, was discovered to have cancer and, in less than one year, passed away.
I was so fed up with my life in Bristol at the end of 2021, thinking that this city could not give me what I was looking for, that I decided to look around for a better solution for where to spend my life.
In November 2021, I arrived in Newcastle upon Tyne, and immediately I found a nice job, a nice flat to rent, which later I bought, and a nice man I married just two weeks ago.
But how could it happen after all these years full of tragedies, lies, depression, loneliness, and abuse?
This is my secret.
After the first shock, I immediately reacted with optimism, thinking that there was a solution to the problem and i had enough strength and experience to succeed.
I am not religious but spiritual, and I have started to think that the universe and my spiritual guide will run to help me if I trust them and listen to their messages.
In those dramatic moments, I can see who my real friends are, and I never feel alone thanks to this. Sometimes, like in Bristol, people I just met become, after a couple of weeks, my best and most trustworthy friends.
I try to trust people and see the best in them, but I keep myself far from gossip, noisy human beings, and ignorance.
I like culture and try the impossible to learn as much as I can every single day, keeping my mind awake and in exercise.
I try to smile and laugh at strange facts happening during the day.
I try to see the comic side of situations and people.
Where do I meet my husband?
I met him thanks to a dating website called Bumble. I contacted him because I was fascinated by his beautiful eyes and after a couple of chats, we decided to meet in person to see if there was interest.
It worked instantly and after two years and a half, we are now husband and wife.
We had some difficult moments when we decided to live in a horrible area of Newcastle called Coxlodge but also in that period, I tried to change the whole situation as best I could to find a balance between us, our working life and our needs.
I told my husband since the first appointment that I do not like to have a pluriamorose relationship ( so popular nowadays ) or a special female friend of his childhood who is too good and jealous to ruin any new relationship.
I was looking for a mature man, even if younger than me, who was intelligent and able to respect me and my independence.
I trusted him from the first moment, and he trusted me.
While living in Bristol, friendship was the most important value for me so I did not look for a partner … But here in Newcastle upon Tyne, I have found a man who is in love with me and also a good friend who is ready to listen to me when I need it.
To appear young and healthy, I try to have a good diet, not drink much alcohol, and walk 5 miles a day.
Walking or gardening is not my favourite sport, but it helps my mental health.
Nothing is impossible if you want to reach the top of the hill and remember … age is just a number.
Thanks for reading.
I arrived in the UK in 2011 with several goals different from what I achieved today after 13 years
In those days, I arrived with my ex-partner and my 9-year-old daughter, thinking of staying in London for only one year before moving to Australia.
But all my projects changed drastically when I discovered that the father of my daughter was cheating on me when he was going back to Italy with an excuse to work. We split and carried on to live with my daughter, but after 3 years, my daughter decided to leave London and study in Italy.
In those moments, I thought I had seen the bad side of my life, but the worst had not yet arrived.
Because of my fragility and loneliness, in those days I chose again the wrong man, and straight away I gave my heart to a selfish narcissist who was more interested in taking pictures of girls 40 years younger than him instead of creating a new life with me.
I tried to work on this relationship for three long years, closing my eyes, but in the end, I had to run away from his emotional abuse.
I left London and moved to Bristol, restarting a new life in 2019
Everything seemed to be working perfectly with a new flat, a new job, and new friends. In those days, I was so concentrated on myself and my well-being that I rejected any relationships, apart from some flirts.
But in early 2020, the COVID pandemic started, and I had to spend 6 months of my life isolated in my flat, far from friends and family.
In those days, many people could have fallen into depression because of the strange and dangerous situation, but I found again the strength to create a new job and start to work for Bristol University.
In the COVID pandemic, a contract of work was surely better than working as a self-employed person. Then I joined a hiking group and enjoyed almost two years-long walks around the countryside of Somerset, Cotswold, Devon, and Wiltshire.
But the unlucky period was not finished yet
One of my best friends, part of the hiking group, was discovered to have cancer and, in less than one year, passed away.
I was so fed up with my life in Bristol at the end of 2021, thinking that this city could not give me what I was looking for, that I decided to look around for a better solution for where to spend my life.
In November 2021, I arrived in Newcastle upon Tyne, and immediately I found a nice job, a nice flat to rent, which later I bought, and a nice man I married just two weeks ago.
But how could it happen after all these years full of tragedies, lies, depression, loneliness, and abuse?
This is my secret.
After the first shock, I immediately reacted with optimism, thinking that there was a solution to the problem and i had enough strength and experience to succeed.
I am not religious but spiritual, and I have started to think that the universe and my spiritual guide will run to help me if I trust them and listen to their messages.
In those dramatic moments, I can see who my real friends are, and I never feel alone thanks to this. Sometimes, like in Bristol, people I just met become, after a couple of weeks, my best and most trustworthy friends.
I try to trust people and see the best in them, but I keep myself far from gossip, noisy human beings, and ignorance.
I like culture and try the impossible to learn as much as I can every single day, keeping my mind awake and in exercise.
I try to smile and laugh at strange facts happening during the day.
I try to see the comic side of situations and people.
Where do I meet my husband?
I met him thanks to a dating website called Bumble. I contacted him because I was fascinated by his beautiful eyes, and after a couple of chats, we decided to meet in person to see if there was interest.
It worked instantly and after two years and a half, we are now husband and wife.
We had some difficult moments when we decided to live in a horrible area of Newcastle called Coxlodge but also during that period, I tried to change the whole situation as best I could to find a balance between us, our working lives, and our needs.
I told my husband since the first appointment that I do not like to have a pluriamorose relationship ( so popular nowadays ) or a special female friend of his childhood who is too good and jealous to ruin any new relationship.
I was looking for a mature man, even younger than me, who was intelligent and able to respect me and my independence.
I trusted him from the first moment, and he trusted me.
While living in Bristol, friendship was the most important value for me so I did not look for a partner … But here in Newcastle upon Tyne, I have found a man who is in love with me and also a good friend who is ready to listen to me when I need it.
To appear young and healthy, I try to have a good diet, not drink much alcohol, and walk 5 miles a day.
Walking or gardening is not my favourite sport, but it helps my mental health.
Nothing is impossible if you want to reach the top of the hill and remember, age is just a number.
Thanks for reading.